14 High School Students OD on Gummy Bears; Weed Suspected

Kids: Do not take candy from strangers. It could be a burn.

Weed gummy bears just can’t catch a break. More than a dozen high-school students from Naperville, Illinois, a Chicago suburb, were taken to the hospital after ingesting gummy bears allegedly infused with marijuana. Here we go again.

From CNN

“By the afternoon, most of the students had been released from the hospital with two remaining for further evaluation. Students told police that they thought the gummy bears were ‘laced with something with marijuana, like a liquid-based marijuana substance,’ said Naperville Police commander Jason Arres.”

Giving weed the benefit of the doubt, commander Arres added, “However, we have not confirmed that. This is simply what we are being told by some of the patients."

One student was reportedly taken into custody, but released without being charged, and police are conducting tests on the suspected culprit candy.

The Naperville gummy bear fiasco is indicative of a sad state of affairs for teenaged rebellion and cannabis edibles. In regard to the former: If you’re munching down marijuana-infused foods at school, get a little too high, and the first person you turn to is the nurse, you’re a narc. As to the gummy bears: We’re sorry you’re always catching shade and taking heat because youths and pets and middle-aged adults don’t seem to know how much of you should be included in a dose. 

The Illinois Medical Cannabis Pilot Program, passed in 2013, has yet to include an update to mandate that all edible marijuana products be produced only in state-regulated kitchens. So the weed-liquid-substance some of the distressed students suspected had been added to the gelatin bears may have been homemade, and not purchased at one of the state’s more than 30 licensed dispensaries.

The symptoms that sent the students to the hospital reportedly included increased heart rate, dizziness, and dry mouth––which can occur among high school scholars when asking your crush to the school dance, a scenario that hasn't yet been ruled out.