Ask Maria: I Dream of Turkey

What's it mean when turkeys keep popping into my dreams?

Hola Maria,

Lately, my dreams have had a reoccurring character, almost every night I lay my head to sleep: a dang turkey. I'm eating turkey, I'm killing and cooking turkey, I'm chasing turkeys through the wild, I'm engaging in intense parkour battles with a turkey sporting a neon mohawk. Last night, my husband was a turkey, and he was skateboarding all over our turkey kids? I have no idea. It's turkey time almost every time I close my eyes. What does this all mean?

Debbie the Tryptophan Dreamer

Hola, Debbie,

The turkey is a handsome and noble animal. Did you know that Ben Franklin, in a letter to his daughter, stated that the turkey would be a much better symbol for America than the bald eagle? It's true. Turkeys are more respectable, birds of courage, according to Ben. Unfortunately, however, dreaming of turkeys doesn't signal such virtuous themes. According to internet mystics, dreaming of turkey foreshadows misery and serious mistakes ahead. Financial problems may be in your future if you dream of a dead turkey, and a roasted turkey means lack of funds. In general, turkey dreams can hint at complications of uneasiness in your relationships, whether they be romantic, platonic, or business oriented. However, a turkey puffing up its feathers indicates that you will overcome an obstacle. Though it's important to keep the context in mind. If you dream of a turkey jumping on your father's head while he sings a lullaby then you probably have some paternal issues to ruminate on. Or, the more likely scenario, is that you're stressed out about Thanksgiving this year and your dream conscience is scolding you for celebrating a holiday rooted in the genocidal tides of young America wiping out the majority of its indigenous peoples. But hey! There's not much you can do about that now. So sit back, load your pipe, and be thankful for the positives in your life, and try to enjoy some food. Then your mind will be clear to have stress dreams about Black Friday deals and the ghastly deathgrip of capitalism. Fun!

Buena suerte, and happy Thanksgiving,