Canada Is Selling Imperfect Produce to Recruit Americans

Imperfect fruit is fruit too!

Not only does America care so much about what we all look like each and every day, apparently there are beauty standards for fruits and veggies too.

And because the U.S. wont sell ugly fruits, like misshapen apples or a wonky head of lettuce, that food vanity is contributing to 1.3 billion tons of food that is wasted each year. Way to go, America!

While America is slowly going right into the suck hole of the universe lately, Canada has stepped up her game (once again) and is willing to sell those ugly pieces of fruit. 

“Waste not, want not,” Canada said in an official statement about Americans being huge assholes.

The Canadian supermarket chain Lowblaws’ is selling all the “naturally imperfect” produce you can imagine, and shoppers are lining up for miles to get it.

Simply, Canada doesn’t follow the (crazy) USDA guidelines that state apples have to be perfectly round and of a perfect shade or hue. So they can sell tasty apples that take the shape of a flattened ball or a crescent moon.

And if you’re still not sold on moving to Canada, take this into consideration: Those northern grocers are selling the semi-deformed produce to help reduce the crushing California drought.

Listen, Canada isn’t the first to sell natural fruits as they appear when picked and pulled—France especially, and countries all over Europe are not insane and do the same thing. In fact, France reported an increase in profits and less waste by selling natural shit; so it was just a matter of time before glorious Canada caught on.

These fruits and veggies are the plus-size models of food, and now it’s their time to shine, shine, shine!

Seems like Canada really will accept all of us for who we are, even our terrible American souls; so that’s nice.